Day 14 A Lesson
SYNOPSIS: NO NEED TO READ THIS. NOTHING HAPPENED TODAY. JUST THINKING OUT LOUD.I simply could not get up. My last day in Lebanon was to be split into a visit of the famous Armenian treasure saved by brave people from the time of the genocide and displayed at an Armenian church at the outskirts of Beirut, and a good-bye lunch with Setareh. But I just could not get up.As every morning, I did my email and chatted with David on Skype between 7-8 AM. But after that, I don’t know what it was. My chest hurt, my throat hurt, my head hurt, but I knew I was not sick. So I slept for another hour. Then I decided to skip the museum and just sleep for another two hours. And by 2 PM, after I had slept for another few hours, I had to get up and tell Setareh that our lunch would not happen. I was just too exhausted. She was very understanding.I guess, I have run myself into the ground. Diane, you saw it coming! No, I don’t have boundless energy and looking back at the last two weeks I have to wonder who on earth can sustain a 16 hour day every day?I took count: I got up every day between 7-8 AM to take care of emails and business at home. By 9 AM, I was out the door doing stuff, usually back around 7 PM. That was a 10 hour day of walking, photographing, being in transit. The down time I got in the buses usually was stress: The smoking – yes, 15 people crammed into a bus and people still smoke! They think they are considerate by opening a window which only blows the smoke full blast into the back of the bus and makes the bus drafty. My stomach was always at 50% by the time I got out, my eyes were watery, my face burning… That does not count as down time. From 7 PM to midnight I would write my blog and download the blog photos. When the internet was slow that could take until 1 or even 1:30 AM which only left 6 hours of sleep. Even at home I know I do best with at least 7, better 8 hours.The good thing is that I have no outside obligations. Nobody to socialize with, no homework, no house work, no entertainment. But still. It’s not working. I can do this for a 2-3 week trip, but I have 3 months ahead of me.Who do I think I am? I am not 20 or 30 anymore! I have to figure something out. I like to write my blog as it helps me to think through the events of the day. But I also realize the difference: Scribbling into my personal notebook and writing for an unknown audience is a different ball game. I don’t mind it – I will benefit from careful notes in the long run myself; but it takes a lot of time.In an apartment where there are no curtains, I wake up by 7 AM. Can’t help it. So sleeping in is difficult. Perhaps, I need to give myself a curfew of 11 PM to get 8 hours of sleep. OK, I will start with that. I will stop my blog work mid-sentence if I have to at 11 PM. I am sure you will understand.After I slept today away, I should be fresh and ready to go. I got caught up with my blog. There is something I accomplished today after all. :-)Off to Syria!Good night.