Day 14 A Lesson

SYNOPSIS:  NO NEED TO READ THIS. NOTHING HAPPENED TODAY. JUST THINKING OUT LOUD.I simply could not get up.  My last day in Lebanon was to be split into a visit of the famous Armenian treasure saved by brave people from the time of the genocide and displayed at an Armenian church at the outskirts of Beirut, and a good-bye lunch with Setareh.  But I just could not get up.As every morning, I did my email and chatted with David on Skype between 7-8 AM.  But after that, I don’t know what it was.  My chest hurt, my throat hurt, my head hurt, but I knew I was not sick.  So I slept for another hour.  Then I decided to skip the museum and just sleep for another two hours. And by 2 PM, after I had slept for another few hours, I had to get up and tell Setareh that our lunch would not happen.  I was just too exhausted.  She was very understanding.I guess, I have run myself into the ground.  Diane, you saw it coming!  No, I don’t have boundless energy and looking back at the last two weeks I have to wonder who on earth can sustain a 16 hour day every day?I took count:  I got up every day between 7-8 AM to take care of emails and business at home.  By 9 AM, I was out the door doing stuff, usually back around 7 PM.  That was a 10 hour day of walking, photographing, being in transit.  The down time I got in the buses usually was stress:  The smoking – yes, 15 people crammed into a bus and people still smoke! They think they are considerate by opening a window which only blows the smoke full blast into the back of the bus and makes the bus drafty.  My stomach was always at 50% by the time I got out, my eyes were watery, my face burning…  That does not count as down time.  From 7 PM to midnight I would write my blog and download the blog photos.  When the internet was slow that could take until 1 or even 1:30 AM which only left 6 hours of sleep.  Even at home I know I do best with at least 7, better 8 hours.The good thing is that I have no outside obligations.  Nobody to socialize with, no homework, no house work, no entertainment.  But still.  It’s not working. I can do this for a 2-3 week trip, but I have 3 months ahead of me.Who do I think I am?  I am not 20 or 30 anymore!  I have to figure something out.  I like to write my blog as it helps me to think through the events of the day.  But I also realize the difference:  Scribbling into my personal notebook and writing for an unknown audience is a different ball game.  I don’t mind it – I will benefit from careful notes in the long run myself; but it takes a lot of time.In an apartment where there are no curtains, I wake up by 7 AM.  Can’t help it.  So sleeping in is difficult.  Perhaps, I need to give myself a curfew of 11 PM to get 8 hours of sleep.  OK, I will start with that.  I will stop my blog work mid-sentence if I have to at 11 PM.   I am sure you will understand.After I slept today away, I should be fresh and ready to go.  I got caught up with my blog.  There is something I accomplished today after all.  :-)Off to Syria!Good night.